My evil plan

Congratulations on being the creator of a new Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Soul Accumulation

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Mom never loved me

Stage One:

To begin your plan, you must first Traumatize a Pope. This will cause the world to sit up and take notice, stunned by your arrival. Who is this Threat to our Children? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good as a Dark Gunslinger?

Stage Two:

Next, you will Steal the Internet. This will cause countless hordes of Mean English Teachers to flock to you, begging to do your every bidding. Your name will become synonymous with Metal, as lesser men whisper your name in terror.

Stage Three:

Finally, you will Unleash your Needlessly Big Weather Machine, bringing about the Apocalypse. This will all be done from a Medieval Castle, an excellent choice if we might say. These three deeds will herald the end, and the citizens of this planet will have no choice but to elect you their new god.

Trust us, it'll all come together in the end.